Release Your Inner-Douchebag

release-your-inner-doucheI went to the movies today and discovered that being old comes with a lot of advantages after a woman answered 3 calls during the movie.  The top 3 advantages are discounts, medical marijuana, and, of course, the respect of 90% of people 20 years younger than you which are in abundance when you break 65. The bonus is the 10% are afraid of the backlash from onlookers to talk shit to seniors. The respect is what counts, and it’s the next best thing to freedom of speech.

You can talk on your phone in movies, demand special treatment, and say what’s on your mind no matter the situation without question.  So, it’s perfect for people that have never unleashed their inner douche bag, and a smooth transition for people who have been dicks all their lives.  So, if you’re a nice person and often wonder when you’ll have to stop taking shit, you’re welcome.  If you’re an asshole and are now smiling boldly at this new revelation, go to the nearest door and slam the knob into your genitalia immediately!

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